If you have keen eyes, you may have already noticed my other blog. Tonight, I’m polishing up a little paper due by tomorrow midnight. If you have the chance, and if psychology doesn’t bore you to tears, please take a look at my most recent draft (whichever you see, there’ll be a few) and post a critique?
I’m looking for thoughts on a) idea presentation, b) grammer/spelling, c) logic, and d) correct use of the APA reference format.
Thanks a million!
PS: If you see a draft but no Comments link available, that means I’m editing that post or creating a newer draft. In other words, there will be another post soon to comment on.
May 18, 2004 @ 18:51:37
I can’t seem to post on the other page, so I’ll comment over here before I forget.- Your intro paragraph states your purpose of “determine how the majority stands”. However, your supporting paragraphs are more exposition than argumentative. So either draw a conclusion at the end, or generalize the opening statement so your essay is about describing the 2 schools of though, rather than choosing sides.- I would refrain from starting 3 paragraphs in a row with a name.- nitpicky point: define “g” and “s” as soon as possible, don’t leave “s” at the end of the paragraph
May 18, 2004 @ 18:53:47
Aw poop, scratch that first point. You revised the draft while I was commenting…
May 18, 2004 @ 22:35:27
Feedback noted for draft #4. Thanks!